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Even though we may be slow to co-operate with His work, God calls us forward though the Holy Spirit’s never-ending work of bringing forth change we call “growth in Christ”. Change is meant to be constant and consistent through life on this side of eternity because of His faithfulness to complete every good work He begins in us. The paradigm is always upward, always higher, always Glory to Glory. The only thing we should settle for is ongoing and never ending “more”. Yet, how common is it in our life, or in the lives of our brethren, to not see significant change across years of being in His presence?

 

Again, if we are honest, we might agree that this is a question we don’t ask ourselves as often and deeply as we should. Years ago, at the outset of Matthias Ministries, I was certain that the Lord showed me a pattern within communal worship that would bring significant change and growth to the Body of Christ. Multiple confirmations to this were overwhelming and came in the most profound and unlikely ways. We actually did see aspects of what Matthias Ministries introduced within Harp and Bowl Worship impact individuals and a number of local churches. Yet, across several years and many beautiful times of His presence in our midst, I could not discern the kind of change, either within myself or others, I believe my heart had been given to hope for. I began to wonder what that hope of growth I believe within my spirit might look like.

 

All to say that this became the crux of my question, as I wrestled with the sense that the ministry I was giving my life to was lacking the dynamic “more” I knew was missing. It was a long season of questions. As I continued to ask, seek and knock it was God who presented a question to me, and that question brought significant change to my life.

 

 

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The life defining question mentioned above began in the quiet hours after His presence filled Matthias Ministries events known as “Evenings of Hosting the Holy Spirit”. It was during these reflective and meditative moments that God began to place a question within me that became impossible to ignore. Discernment, often a process, left me feeling increasingly compelled to understand what I was wrestling with. As the ministry founder, it soon became prudent for Matthias Ministries to cease moving ahead until clarity came.

 

The experience brought to remembrance an important truth. Sometimes it is during the busiest seasons of ministry where the better choice is found in embracing the stillness we might otherwise resist in order to wait upon Him. Despite her sister Mary's objection, Martha was the wiser as she chose to sit at the feet of Jesus (Luke 10: 38-42). In like manner there may be occasions when others fail to understand or agree with our decision to lay aside laboring and busyness. Such misunderstandings are understandable as we co-labor and our efforts affect others. Yet, the personal choice to cease our activity and become still enough to listen and more fully grasp the revelation He may desire to impart is the wisdom every believer should live for. Still, truth be told it is often not others, but our own tendencies toward busyness that distract us from the vital still and quiet "Selah moments" with Him. Thank God for His loving patience as we grow in maturity in this regard.

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It was in wrestling with my need for clarity during the aforementioned quiet season that God began to open my understanding. Although not audible to my ear, He faithfully brought clarity to what my spirit was yearning for. His question became as unmistakably simple as it was profound. It seemed all I could hear for that powerful season was “you do well in seeking My Presence, yet will you seek My Purpose in it?”

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